A Christmas Memory

Three years ago today I was officially diagnosed with relapsed Hodgkin's lymphoma.  Oncology clinic was only open a half day, and I remember going with my dad that Monday morning.  Even though it was Christmas Eve, life went on as usual at oncology.  I remember them presenting the various chemo options, scheduling a date for surgery for my port, and reviewing my blood work.  I remember hugging my nurse a Merry Christmas, and feeling so overwhelmed as she held me.
           That Christmas Eve, I had just finished my first, absolutely fantastic, semester of college. I had played in a string quartet at a Christmas service.  Presents were wrapped, guests were coming in to spend the holiday, and it seemed a quintessential Christmas celebration.
          But it wasn't.  Through the whole weekend I, and my family, savored every moment. Petty disputes were dismissed, and trivial mishaps ignored.  We were together. For how long, we didn't know.  I don't remember what gift I got, or what gift I gave,  but I remember being there all together.  Through Christmas day, neighbors and friends dropped by, to celebrate Christmas with us.
           Here I am, three years later.  I've just finished my seventh semester of college, and really well for me, all things considered.  I just played a string quartet service with my siblings. The presents are wrapped, and the house is ready for the impending arrival of the guests.  It's easy to get caught up in the hustle and bustle of the holidays.  Dinner guests and engagements, staff meetings and Christmas parties- life is busy. But I don't want to forget what is truly important.  What Christmas is really about.  It's about the birth of a deity, come down to man, to save us from ourselves. God gave his "only begotten son", so that we may have eternal life.
          I think the key word is gave.  God gave, and so should we. Christmas is about giving- maybe giving presents to family, but so much more than just that.  It's about giving love to the unloved. It's about giving cheer to the unhappy. It's about giving kindness to the forgotten.
This Christmas, give outside your normal giving zone.  Maybe you always give to the Salvation Army bell ringer- that's great, but perhaps it's time to go a little beyond that.  Maybe give a gift to a hurting or needy family. Buy some items of a non-profit's Amazon Wish List.  If you're short on the cash, give of your time.  Volunteer at the City Mission or Haven of Rest; cook dinner at the Ronald McDonald House. Walk the dogs at One of a Kind Pet Rescue.  Clean the home of an elderly friend.  Invite a lonely person to share your Christmas dinner.

         The weekend before that Christmas Eve, I had spent in the hospital, following a spleen biopsy.  That was one of my most memorable hospital stays.  I was there technically just for observation, so I was free to roam around.  Rachel stayed with me, and with our reindeer antlers we owned the halls. We made K-cups of Starbucks coffee, ordered all sorts of food, and happily watched Hallmark movies.  It was a special sister weekend, even if it was spent in a hospital.  At that point, I knew the cancer had returned, but didn't know the specifics.  We both knew it was a last hurrah before I would be back in the throws of treatment. And I saw Santa Claus.  I know he isn't real, and I've never believed in him.  But that Christmas, I needed something childish and fantastical to believe in.  Reality was overwhelming, so I entered the magical fairy tale of Santa Claus, and became obsessed with him. My child-life helped me Skype with Santa, a very special memory!
          But I was blessed to be able to be home for Christmas.  There are many who aren't so blessed.  They'll be spending Christmas in a hospital room.  Their four bleak walls bear no Christmas cheer.  They long for the company of their family and friends. Maybe go sing some carols, or take some small Christmas present in a fun wrapping paper. I think this Christmas carol is a fitting end:

Thou didst leave Thy throne and Thy kingly crown,

When Thou camest to earth for me;

But in Bethlehem’s home was there found no room

For Thy holy nativity.

O come to my heart, Lord Jesus,

There is room in my heart for Thee.

This Christmas, may there be room in all our hearts for the reason for Christmas, Jesus.  

Christmas 2012

More fun stuff from the PICU!

Here are just a few other moments in the PICU...but this first picture is in oncology.  For those of you who have entered the oncology ward, there are colored handprints all along the walls.  Those are the handprints of those who have completed their journey, and are done as they leave the ward.  I really looked forward to putting my handprint up there one day, but because I was discharged from Seidman Cancer Center, I never got the opportunity.  After my PICU stay and my one night in oncology, I signed my print as a signal that my cancer journey is over! Mine is the bright purple one directly above my head!! 

With Lisa in PICU

Poster (by Rachel) and a birthday card from coworkers

With April! 

Live Long and Prosper!

While I was in the PICU, I spent some time with Michelle, the lovely art therapist at Rainbow.  We were able to do a lot of fun things together...one of which was making plaster cast.

First we are mixing plaster in a bucket...

All set to make a mold!

Waiting for the mold to harden

Now we're pouring the plaster!

To be added one of these days...A picture of the final product!!
Thank you Michelle! 

The Terrific Therapists!

While doctors and the medical team do their best to help heal my body, the amazing therapists here help keep my mind in shape! They help make the long, boring days at the hospital just a little bit shorter and lot more fun!  I'd like to introduce you to this set of amazing ladies...

This is Emily.  She is a music therapist.  She plays many instruments, and sings like an angel.  I've often heard her accompanying kids on the guitar, with songs ranging from "3 Little Monkeys" to "Jingle Bells"! At my request she brought me a beautiful electronic keyboard, and a pedal! She also threw in a piano solo collection!  I've so enjoyed playing through the music book, as it is filled with hymns, folk songs, and classical piano pieces.  When she visited once, I played and she sang! I also brought piano music my piano teacher had given me especially for the hospital.  The keyboard enables me to practice (I try to daily!) as music is both therapeutic and enjoyable.  Thank you Emily!

The next therapist you've met before- Angela!  She makes so many amazing things happen around here!  If there's ever anything I need, from hair washes to bunny ears, to diaries and lip balm, she'll somehow find it and bring it!  She's like a magician, conjuring fun ideas, wanted items, and always with a smile!  She also coordinates the volunteers for the play room and special events.  Thanks Angela!  

There's also another child life I'd like you to meet- Lisa!  Her main job is in the outpatient oncology clinic, but she also covers the inpatient.  She always has a sympathetic ear, that I can pour out my worries or complaints to; she will respond with a well thought out and comforting answer, that always calms me.  Thank you Lisa- for always being there when I need you!  

Last, but not least, is the art therapist- Michelle!  Before my BMT hospitalization, I'd never before met Michelle, but I'm so glad I have!  On the days I'm not feeling up to going to the play room, she brings me stuff to do in bed!  She has brought me oil pastels and art supplies kits, along with drawing pads, to help unleash my inner artist :) She also finds cool kits, like a pop-up-book and mini drawing easels to help pass the time in bed.  But I think her greatest find was duck tape!  I'd never done duck tape crafts before, but after she brought me a tote kit I was hooked!   One Friday, she scrounged around and brought me all the duck tape kits she could find, so I would have stuff for the weekend.  It was awesome! Rachel and I made roses, and wallets, handbags, and so many cool things!  Now most weekends I spend my time creating with duck tape!  Thanks Michelle!  

Moving Day!

Because of the water condition in Rainbow's oncology ward, the entire ward was moved to the Seidman Cancer Center- the big shiny glass building.  I especially wanted to let those who want to visit know, to save you a long walk!
It was a humongous undertaking, as all the patients, medical records, and so much more had to be transported to the other end of the hospital! Kudos to the nurses, doctors, and numerous volunteers for helping make it such a smooth move!!

Rachel packing all my stuff up! 

Who knew how much stuff I could accumulate in four weeks!!

The Princess preparing her personal belongings

The move could not have been done without the help of volunteers. Here are two helping load carts with all my stuff, including my refrigerator!  

One of the many carts

Rounding up all the stuff...

The Princess and her entourage!  (I didn't say that, the others did!) 

What with the pole and all, it is a two-person job to take me anywhere! 

My royal escort...

My new room has a lovely view, in both day and night.  

Rachel already beginning on decorating my new room! 

A lovely towel origami swan to welcome me to my new room... 

Spring Fling!

One of the patients here had the brilliant idea to hold a "Spring Fling" party, which was on Good Friday.  The Amazing Angela (the Child Life Specialist) documented all the details that this patient had envisioned for this party, and made it happen, right down to the formal invitations!!  It was an amazing party, and I had an awesome time!

Hanging out with Olena, one of the many amazing volunteers I've become friends with! 

The morning was spent painting Easter eggs, which I've never done before.  A lady from the Kylie Jane Long Foundation brought all the necessary supplies.  She got the kitchen to hard-boil 72 eggs, and helped everyone decorate the eggs.  We used decorated shrink wrappers, rubber bands, and crayons to make cool designs on the eggs. The craft room was full of kids happily decorating!

Painting my first Easter eggs!  

Rachel and I doing our eggs

There was a really fun game to open the party.  On the center of five plates were two small jelly beans.  Then a nurse covered the jelly beans in a veritable mountain of whipped cream.  Each plate was set before five people sitting in chairs, with their hands behind their back.  The five included the two pediatric residents, the palliative care doctor, and two nurses!  On the count of three, each of them used their face alone to find the elusive jelly beans and place it outside the plate first! It was hilarious to watch each of them with a face full of whipped cream.  I'm proud to report that my resident, Dr. Brown won first place!! Unfortunately, the pictures of his whip creamed face turned out too blurry to post :(

Doc Brown hugging his prize- Brutus!

People had donated a sno cone maker and a cotton candy maker.  There was also pizza and an ice cream sundae bar.

Friends sharing sno cones...

The ice cream bar; note the invitation on the right

After the eating festivites, Rachel brought out her nail polish, and we had a nail party!  All the little girls loved it!

Rachel painting Carla's nails...

Little Totty wanted to paint Big Miranda's nails...and Miranda graciously let her!  

Everyone left with a huge Easter basket.  One nurse's church made and donated all the baskets. There were enough baskets for all the patients, and even all their siblings!  The baskets all had different themes, and were age and gender coordinated, with candy and fun goodies. Thank you to those who made them!

Some  of the Easter goodies!

All in all, it was the most fun I've had in a very long time.  But it couldn't have happened without so many people who had given of their time, energy, and money to make a special Easter celebration for the oncology ward.  A huge thank you to the many people who worked so hard to make it happen.  People like you are tangible reminders of the love God showed at the very first Easter, and helped us have an amazing Easter weekend.  

The Easter Bunny with her basket! 

Thank you to whoever packed this awesome basket! 

A Bit of Pampering....

One of the most wonderful experiences of going through cancer is all the love I encounter.  I think the deeper in pain one is, the greater the love shown to pull them out. People extend more love, but I feel that the more you are hurting the more sensitive you become to the love that is shown.  So on those lines....let me tell you about a few "strangers" who've extended their love to me...

Charlie and Courtney from John Roberts Spa and Salon 

These dear gals showed up to pamper anyone and everyone at Rainbow!  I had a lot of icky glue in my hair from the EEG; to compound that, I'm not allowed to take a proper shower, as it will get my dressing wet.  So....I had a lovely shampoo and blow dry by these dear girls.  They creatively worked around my IV stand, propping me up in the sink with pillows and an office chair!  They also gave me a lovely hand massage complete with salon nail treatments!  After they were through with me, they went on to bring some special joy to other patients.  Thank you so much for giving of your time and talents to make me feel special!!